Given the ongoing COVID-19 pandemic, I, like many others had to endure the pleasure of having to complete my fourth and final year of my undergrad degree, whilst attending
✨ Zoom university ✨
We all understand that measures had to be put in place to ensure the continued safety not only of the staff and faculty, but so too the students, and well, everyone else.
My first encounter with zoom actually started from having to finish up a Political Science class back in March-April of 2020 when the news of the pandemic first hit, and it was such a weird setup.
That transition from just sitting in a classroom, to now having to access a link and sit behind your computer screen not only to take notes but that in itself was your way of being present in your lecture, it was so strange.
Unfortunately, back then we were still naive, but hopeful that things would clear up, and re-open by the summertime, and this zoom thing was just a now-for-now, trying to address the situation so that we could still end the 2019-2020 academic year off without too many disturbances.
However as I sat down that warm summer day in June 2020 last year, as my enrolment access opened up to pick my classes for my final year, and to see every single one categorized as either being synchronous or asynchronous (two words I had never heard of before delving into the world that is online school), but ultimately ENTIRELY ONLINE was a bit of a blow.
I was so excited for my final year, being the Co-president of the club I’d learned to call my home-away-from-home, making those last bitter-sweet memories with my friends, working part-time in a position I’d always dreamed of doing.
I was even excited for my final class on the Glendon campus that I’d had that love/hate relationship with over the years, but could never truly stay away.
There were so many things I was looking forward to, that all came crashing down when reality hit that we were about to be completely online for who knows how long.
Zoom lingo became the new normal, in the no-longer-normal world.
Phrases I heard on a daily basis:
“Please mute yourselves”
“Turn on your cameras” and the occasional nicer professor who would include “if you’re comfortable enough”
“Use the raise hand feature”
“Can everyone hear me clearly”
“Professor, I need permission to share the screen”
“Can everyone see my screen”
“[Insert name here] we couldn’t hear your last sentence because your connection cut out”
And the EVER DREADED:
“I’m going to split you all up into breakout rooms.”
If I have to hear the words “Breakout room” again, well this is exactly how I feel about it:
That paired with the dead silence in the room when a professor would ask a question and no one would answer. Even worse when maybe 2 people out of a class of 30 had their cameras on.
It was strange for me, coming originally from York’s smaller campus where I didn’t have any more than about 30 students in class with me, to attend my first few classes on the main campus where I believe my largest class size was about 80 students.
Then cue COVID, and online classes, and here I was sitting in a zoom session with over 100 students.
Of course, we were no strangers to the zoom lag with so many people. Plus I got to experience the occasional clown who tried to act possessed in one of the classes and un-muting themselves to scream at the professor, and disappear, and then come back under a different name only to do it again.
Those asynchronous classes were also a tough one to work through.
I've always been someone who works well with time specifically carved out for tasks, so attending a class that is set for a certain time, like 9am - 12pm, and then you determining how you'll organize yourself to get the required assignments and tasks done, that always worked for me.
With the asynchronous classes now, this meant that you did not have a set time to attend a lecture weekly, rather the professor would upload some videos, or pre-record the lecture to watch, and then you would have to complete any assignments given out at the beginning of the week, by the end of the week or before the portal would close.
I only had one of those types of classes my entire academic year, and it was by far the worst, due to the extensive amount of work given outside of the lectures. I was drowning.
To make it even more challenging, it was one of my purely French classes as well, so you already know, a girl was ✨STRESSEDT.✨(but in french)
The weirdest thing for me I would say, was having to do presentations virtually, WORSE YET group presentations.
I’ve always been extremely shy doing group presentations in front of my classes in previous years, whether in front of a class of 5 people, or a class of 30+ people always made me nervous, nauseous and left me trembling.
Doing presentations virtually, removed a lot of that nervousness for me personally, but there was such a genuine disconnect presenting in front of your laptop, compared to a physical room full of people.
Factor in those long awkward moments and the deafening silence when you ask if anyone has questions at the end of a presentation, and speaking to a room of blank screens with their cameras off, boy oh boy.
Doing presentations online was strange to say the least, but some people took the opportunity to present some really out of the box work, some even going so far as to pre-record their presentations with their groups prior to class and getting to sit back and watch everything with the rest of the class. Working smart and hard.
Online classes, and the work that came with it, whether presentations, assignments, papers and more, it tested every skill I thought I had developed over my time in university.
My motivation levels, discipline, will power and determination, organizational and TIME MANAGEMENT skills and so much more.
It took twice as much effort sometimes to get the bare minimum done, because zoom fatigue is a real thing, and after being on your laptop with low energy exchanges for hours upon end in classes, to then just close the zoom or your video conference app and open up a word document, or google to start your assignment, it just felt like there was no ends to the means.
It was as though you were just stuck in a continuous cycle of your life when you open your laptop, the the little life after closing it, just before you open the laptop right back up again.
I feel like this GIF below describes exactly how 5/7 of the days felt, just that endless loop.
While there was a lot of adjustment that followed with having to do classes online, I feel like there were still some pros to it.
Some professors recorded their lectures for example, as they understood not all of us were located in Toronto, and were experiencing different time zones (I had people in some of my courses who were up at 4 am where they were) which I appreciated, and thank you so much to those who took their time to understand what we as students were going through, and how we felt behind the scenes.
Also, while I lived on campus, or close to campus the entire duration of my undergrad, online school cut even that 10-minute walk from your apartment to class, down to 0.
There was an element of comfort knowing that you could set an alarm for 10 minutes before your class, to still have enough time to get up, brush your teeth, open your curtains, and even make a cup of tea, take a quick shower or something and still not be late, because all you had to do was click a link and you were present in class.
I actually ended up doing an 8:30am class in my final semester after spending my entire degree saying I would never do a class that started any earlier than 9 am, just because of that convenience that became available with it being completely virtual.
Some professors wanted you to have your cameras on, others didn’t care, so if you weren’t up for class that day, because we all have those days, you could easily lie down next to your laptop, camera off, and still pay attention.
Sometimes getting too comfortable affected my focus though, so I had to have that discipline to try and not be in class on my bed every day.
There were some good days, there we some bad.
Some professors were just as stressed out as we were, some hid it pretty well and still tried to make the class engaging, which I appreciated.
However, I feel like for some classes, the workload we received, felt like if there was this assumption that having to go to class from home meant we had all this extra free time.
For me, despite having fewer classes in my final year, I felt like the workload had doubled, almost tripled, and found myself struggling more than usual to find the perfect school-work-assignments-sleep-eat and everything-in-between balance.
I do have to say though, for everyone who endured this completely online academic year of 2020-2021, congrats for making it through!
It was not easy, we were rarely provided with information since everyone was playing it by ear, testing the waters on a regular basis, but we saw it through to the end.
Special shout out to those like me, who had to complete their final year of their undergrad online as well.
Those TikToks and videos circulating, of people talking about having finished their degrees on a random day of the week in their childhood bedroom, I felt it to my CORE.
While not in my childhood bedroom, my undergrad degree, four years of hard work, 8000+ papers submitted (or what felt like it) blood, sweat, and BUCKETS, POOLS, LAKES AND BEACHES of tears came to a very anti-climactic end on Saturday April 10th, 2021 at 8:39 pm, after submitting my FINAL EVER paper for my undergrad.
Pressing that submit button and watching the Turnitin receipt show up, I felt nothing, and I know I’m not the only one who felt that way because there weren't really any highs felt through the completely online platform, not in the ways we would have experienced before.
That feeling you get submitting a final paper in person, online submissions just didn't feel the same.
However, if no one has told you yet, or told you properly, I’m here to say
✨CONGRATULATIONS✨
on making it through this experimental online academic year.
It really did feel like we were the test subjects to see how effective online school could be, how far they could try out new aspects, push the limits, and we therefore had to endure all the mistakes, the ups and the downs, and additional stress created in these situations.
BUT ITS OVER (for now), and I feel like we have come out of it with new skills, especially adaptability, increased patience, a stronger ability to self-motivate, and above all, we should all receive certificates of zoom or video conference software proficiency at this point because that is ALL some of us had to see and work with for days upon end.
We did it, everyone!
As things start to re-open, take some time if you haven’t already, to celebrate your achievements.
Whether that's enjoying a bottle of wine, going on a stress-free stroll, watching a good show, or movie (Marvel is doing the damn thing with all these TV shows!) - it’s up to you to celebrate all you’ve achieved this past virtual year.
So cheers to you all!
Comments