If you're coming here from my Part 1 post, "Graduating!.. During a global pandemic" then you saw the section where I noted that in 2022, the 2020 and 2021 Grads who didn't get to experience an in-person ceremony for their graduating years due to the on-going pandemic, were invited back to their campuses at York in 2022 to have an in-person ceremony!
Even if it's a year later (or two years for some people,) getting the chance to experience that crossing-the-stage-moment that we didn't get to have, that so many of us looked forward to, who could say no!
I mean.. I definitely didn't.
As a (former) international student, just the amount of money we pay in tuition fees alone was a good enough reason to return to York University and have your moment to cross the stage if you could.
For me, my imposter syndrome, paired with just the type of person I am.. being someone who loves to celebrate, no matter the occasion, no matter the size, no matter the reason, I was determined to cross that stage one year later and hear them call out my name and commemorate my achievements I worked so hard to attain, once again.
Earlier in the year, York sent out an email notice about hosting Alumni Graduation/Convocation ceremonies for the 2020 and 2021 graduating classes.
I thought that it was a lovely gesture, because for so many of us attending post-secondary institutions, that moment when you get to cross the stage is such a heavily anticipated way to formally end off and commemorate that milestone achievement you'd been working towards for the last three, four, or more years.
The sign up process for the Alumni ceremony was pretty simple. They sent out forms so persons could indicate their interest a few months in advance, then about a month before the ceremony was meant to take place (still in June as it is commonly understood as the graduation month) they sent more information, like how rent, and pay to rent your official graduation robe and hood.
In true post-secondary environment fashion, we had to pay to rent the gowns. I expected that much, but the $52.00CAD fee was not the price I was expecting to rent a gown for a 3-hour period.
I figured that that was probably how much we would've had to pay, or how much the 2022 graduating year paid to rent their gowns, AND caps, so I didn't make much of a fuss.
Luckily for us (the 2020/21 grads), since we were sent our diplomas and degrees in that large red box, which also came with a graduation cap, we didn't have to purchase an additional cap. (Unless you lost your original cap.)
All the Alumni graduates also had the option of getting up to two tickets per person for your guests who would be coming out to celebrate your slightly delayed ceremony.
Unfortunately as life would have it, my parents and other family members weren't able to make it up to Canada, which I didn't truly expect them to since it wasn't technically my graduating year.
The ceremony was for those of us who missed out on the experience, but it didn't bother me as much as I thought it would that my family couldn't be there, because I know they'll be there at my side to celebrate my next achievement.
What did bother me a bit more, was that none of my friends in Canada (that I asked) were able to come out for me.
It's an unspoken understanding that everyone has different schedules and priorities, but I couldn't shake the creeping feeling of sadness and that thin layer of disappointment leading up to the day of the Alumni ceremony. Especially after having struggled quite a bit over the years with developing and maintaining a strong support system here in Canada as an international student, as I'm sure many other international students have experienced themselves.
I was even contemplating not going to the ceremony at all after finding out the last person I was hoping would come, couldn't anymore.. but I had to remind myself that this was a celebration of my achievements - all the hard work I put in, everything I worked for and earned on my own, all the tears I cried, papers I wrote, grades I anticipated, constructive feedback I applied to produce better work.. My mindset shifted to.. if I didn't show up for myself, who would?
And with that mentality, I woke up bright and early that Saturday morning of the ceremony at 6am, to get ready to leave and get to Glendon Campus for 8:30am. (Since they wanted all the graduates to be there at least 90 minutes in advance to pick up our robes and line up.)
I hadn't been back to Glendon Campus since last year in 2021 to do my own personal photoshoot after my original one had been postponed, so it was nice to be back.
I took a quick trip down memory lane since I got there a bit early, reminiscing on all the good, the bad and the in-between of my time there. Glendon was my first home in Canada, and while I did struggle a lot in my first year, I'll never forget where I started.
After my memory lane trip, I went to pick up my rented robe and hood and got dressed.
The ceremony was being livestreamed, so I was able to find the link to share in my family group chat and with some of my best friends back home, who all showed up for me, even though it was behind a screen.
Let me tell you, long distance, though it is not the easiest thing, it has nothing on the unlimited love and support I feel from my family and friends back home.
It was a bit awkward walking around after getting dressed, seeing everyone with their loved ones, taking pictures of them, with them, and with other graduates.
My head was mostly down in my phone while we were waiting to line up to go into the ceremony, since I hadn't made many connections at the Glendon campus during my undergrad.
My social life at university didn't really kick off until my second year, when I started visiting, (and eventually moved to) the main campus, Keele Campus.
Here I joined the Caribbean club, and met and made most of my friends who were either straight from the Caribbean like me, had a Caribbean background, or were other students I met and befriended, mainly within the Black Student Associations.
(Check my blog post here: "Making the most of your post-secondary experience" where I talk more about what led me to joining a club and what perks I got out of it.)
Being back at the Glendon Campus in such a large social setting, was a slightly uncomfortable reminder of my many.. many failed attempts at making connections there, coming back to bite me in the ass one last time as I stood in the line, awkwardly waiting for something to happen.
Luckily it wasn't too long a wait from getting dressed, to lining up, to leaving the cafeteria where they had all of us lining up in numerical and alphabetical order based on your program and your merit/achievements, whether honours, first class, double major etc.
Since we are still technically in a pandemic, we were encouraged to put our hands over our hearts when it was our turn to cross the stage, rather than shaking the chancellor's hand.
Being one of the few completely solo people at that Graduation ceremony, it also brought certain things into perspective that I sort of overlooked, aside from the awkwardness of being alone.
For example, we were told that we weren't allowed to have any bags or anything additional visible on our person when crossing the stage. The only things seen should be your cap, robe and hood. This makes it a little more difficult if you came with a bag, because where would it go?
I tried packing my essentials in the smallest fanny pack I own - keys, wallet, phone, a snack.. everything had to be stuffed into my fanny pack and tucked under my robe, but by swinging the fanny pack to my back, no one was the wiser (I think.)
A couple minutes after struggling to zip the fanny pack closed for the 5th time, it was finally time for the procession to begin its way to the giant tent in the middle of the campus, where the ceremony was being held.
In true Yok fashion, the ceremony was kicked off with a bagpipes performance, alongside the Faculty and York staff procession, with the Chancellor and other, what I assume are, very important people in York's Academia environment.
There were some introductions, and every few minutes my family and friends back home, who were actively watching the livestream, would point out every time they saw me which made me chuckle, and warmed my heart.
About 20 minutes in, they started lining up the graduates..
This was it... time to cross the stage!
When we picked up our robes earlier, we were also handed these white cards that had the accurate spelling, and phonetic pronunciations of our names - this was to hand to the person calling our names as we crossed the stage, to ensure they would be pronounced correctly.
Some names were fumbled, and were met with chuckles from the audience, and a couple minutes, and about 30 graduates later, it was finally my moment.
I handed off the card to the person collecting them. There were just two people in front of me, and I slowly creeped forward every couple seconds, as my moment inched closer and closer, actively monitoring how persons were putting their hands on their hearts when they came face to face with the Chancellor (I sometimes forget what side of my body my heart is, and needed the reminder.)
Then, it was finally my turn.
Now to everyone reading, allow me to re-introduce myself. My name is Maya Hinds.
"Maya," like the Mayans, Maya and Miguel, Maya Angelo. Mmh-eye-Ah.
The "Hinds" is pronounced like the ketchup "Heinz" or phonetically, like H-EYE-NDZ as it was noted on the card.
As I began to walk forward, they began reading out my name..
Maya .. H... Hi... Hin...
I stood there before the Chancellor, awkwardly smiling with my hand over my heart (the correct way) as they butchered my last name trying to pronounce it correctly, and ultimately.. they didn't. I even tried pronouncing it for them but I don't think they heard.
Maya ... H-EN-ds, they pronounced.
And at that point.. what more could I do but nod, smile and say thank you.
Take a look at the live encounter itself, captured by one of my best friends on her livestream.
I was still there, in-person, getting the chance to be on that stage, having the moment I dreamed about, now 5 years ago, (since the ceremony was a year later) but it was overall, just a funny way to officially say bye to York.
It's funny moments like those that I love sharing with anyone who'll listen, because all I could think in the moment (aside from my family and friends back home who were probably chuckling at the mispronunciation of my one-syllable-surname) was talking about that funny moment on my blog as I'm doing right now.
That, and it was a light moment to add to a day where my energy had been a bit low since the start.
I continued saying thank you to all the others on stage who I passed as I proceeded to follow the line, and then just before I got off the stage, there was a photographer who made me stand on an ‘X’ to get some final photos. And that was it for crossing the stage.
We were directed back to our seats, only then discovering that we were all in different seats than the ones we were in when we first walked into the tent (which is why they told us not to leave our bags anywhere) and sat through some pretty inspiring final speeches, the standout one to me being the one given by an Alumni member from some years back.
She spoke about the struggles of not landing a job even remotely close to what you may have just spent the last few years studying, and provided reassurance for those (like me) who have no clue as to where you're heading next after achieving this milestone.
Her advice was to accept the journey you're on, and know that this is where you're meant to be, even if you don't think that yourself.
Once the ceremony was over, there was an short, and funny failed attempt to throw all the graduation caps in the air like they do in the movies (word didn't pass around quickly enough) but we did get some rounds of applause from everyone in the tent, and that was it, the end of the ceremony.
Then the most awkward moment of the entire day came... post-ceremony picture time.
I was so so uncomfortable asking people to take photos for me. I didn't want to take any time away from the moments with their loved ones, I just wanted a few pictures to share with my own family and friends who couldn't be there with me.
I was able to find one of the rare familiar and friendly faces I knew at Glendon campus, and then another friendly familiar face saw me taking selfies all on my own and offered to take some pictures for me, of me instead.
Both those people caught some amazing photos, and I'm so grateful for them taking the time out of their experience to help me enhance my own.
Take a look at some of my favourite shots below!
After all the photos, there was supposed to be a reception , but I never found it, and by about noon, I dropped off my $52 robe and hood , and started heading out.
Taking one last stroll down memory lane, I stopped in the foyer of the main building, where they were selling York merch, and graduation mementos.
I couldn't pass up the opportunity to get my own little memento to commemorate my graduation, in the form of the cutest little stuffed bear who came with his own graduation set up with a gown, cap and diploma.
Oh the things I do to make my inner child happy.
Ultimately, I'm really glad I went to the ceremony at the end of the day, despite my little disappointment and fear of being all on my own. It gave me the closure I'd been longing for all this time, a year after the virtual ceremony failed to give me that 'closed book' moment I was yearning for.
And even if it was all by myself physically, I knew I wasn't alone virtually or spiritually, and I just continue to hope that my loved ones are proud of me, and of how hard I'm trying to just figure out what my next steps are in this world.
To the 2020, 2021 and 2022 graduates, congrats once again on your achievements!
And here's to our next ceremonies (for those of us who hope to continue on the education path) happening when we anticipate them to be, with no major interruptions or delays, and our loved ones being able to be present there with us to celebrate!
Cheers.